[Ranma][Fanfic][Lime] Childhood of a Modern Dynasty - Chapter 25: The Long, Hard Road to Love ======================================================================= Childhood of a Modern Dynasty Chapter 25: The Long, Hard Road to Love Ranma 1/2 characters/situations created and copyright by Rumiko Takahashi/Shogakukan/Kitty/Fuji/Viz - Used without permission Childhood of a Modern Dynasty series created, written, and copyright 1998-1999 by Jim Lazar An ongoing series set after the end of the Ranma 1/2 manga and anime. "Speech text in double quotes is spoken as Japanese." E-mail comments and/or criticisms to: jim [at] animeprime.com Make sure to check out my Modern Dynasty website for all released CMD stories, graphics files, and other information: http://www.animeprime/ff/md ======================================================================= This chapter is probably a little more suggestive than the other lime chapters of CMD. ======================================================================= >From the personal journal of James Davidson: October 18, 2057 I waved to Akane as I walked up to her newly repaired house. She was sitting on the porch looking a little tired. Well, I guess since Sanma was human again, she must have been busier than normal. How a woman of her age keeps so active is beyond me. I reached the porch and smiled. "Good morning." I leaned down and kissed her cheek. Suddenly, Akane wrapped her arms around my neck. "Don't fight it anymore, James! We were meant to be together," she said in a low seductive voice. "Akane! Stop it!" I tried to pull away, but I was caught in a viselike grip. "I'm married to your grand-niece for goodness sake!!" "Oh, like that matters... you know I don't believe in stopping at one husband." I cried out as her lips reached for mine. "Akane!!" "Are you hitting on my husband again?" I looked to my side to see Akane standing in the doorway to the house. "Huh?" I looked back and forth between the two Akanes and realized my mistake. "You could have told me who you were, Sanma." The Akane on the porch, who was actually Sanma, smiled devilishly. "Yeah, but where would the fun be in that?" I sighed and then looked at the real Akane. "Good morning." We exchanged cheek kisses. "Morning, James. Don't worry about Sanma, he likes to kid around when he's me." "I don't!" Sanma insisted. "By the way, James, your lips are so smooth." She held her hand tenderly to the cheek I kissed and fluttered her eyelashes. I smiled. "That's what Hanaki has always told me." "But Akane's lips are better." I scrunched up my face as if thinking. "Yeah... they are." Sanma glared at me. "You know, I could kill you without lifting a finger." Akane put calming hands on both of our shoulders. "Now, boys, behave yourselves and I'll make something special for lunch." "He started it." "Yummy." Sanma rubbed her stomach. Akane, the real one, bent down and kissed herself. Well that's what it looked like to me. "I'll be back around noon to cook. Don't let Sanma boss you around, James." "Huh?" Akane smiled. "I have a class this morning, so Sanma is going to tell you one of his stories." "Okay, I've been wondering what became of 'Red-chan' and Ukyo." I noticed a frown appear on Akane's face... both of them. "Something wrong?" Sanma spoke. "No... it was just a painful time. Well, enjoy beating up your students, Sparky." She smiled at her wife. "I will." Akane leaned down and gave Sanma another goodbye kiss and then walked away. I watched her leave and then turned back to Sanma. "I hope I didn't bring up some painful memories." "You did, but that's one of the reasons Akane wants me to tell you this story. She came to terms with these events long ago, but they still hurt her. *I* hurt her." *********************************************************************** August 10, 1999 - Southern, Japan Sanma, still in his cat form, slept peacefully on top of Ukyo's chest and purred as she stroked his back. Ukyo stared at the fabric that made up her tent. For some reason, she couldn't seem to fall asleep on that warm August night. She heard the nearby river calling her again with its gentle sounds of cool water rushing over the rocks. She sighed and rose to a sitting position, being careful to cradle the sleeping cat in her lap. "Well, no use lying here staring at that stupid ceiling." Sanma opened his eyes as Ukyo rose from her sleeping mat and placed him on the ground. She grabbed a few things and opened the tent to leave. "Come on, Red-chan." Sanma followed, uncertain where they were going. -C- -M- -D- Ukyo jumped into the river and made a big splash. "Ahhhh.... that feels so good!!" On the shore, Sanma was crouched low and had his paws over his eyes to avoid seeing the naked woman splashing around in the river. "Red-chan, don't you want to join me?" Ukyo smiled, knowing that cats didn't like water. She giggled at her joke. Ukyo finished washing up and then climbed out of the river. She leaned down and picked up the cat. "There... all clean." She cradled Sama in her naked bosom. Sanma squirmed and tried to get out of the embarrassing position he found himself in. In his attempt to get out from between her breasts, he accidentally extended his claws and scratched her. "Ouch!" By reflex, Ukyo dropped the cat. Sanma tumbled from her bosom and ended up sliding into the river. Before Ukyo's startled eyes, the cat transformed into a... "What? A baboon?!" Ukyo stared at the baboon sitting in the shallow water. Sanma looked down as his body and saw that he had transformed. He screeched loudly and hopped out of the river. *********************************************************************** >From the personal journal of James Davidson: October 18, 2057 "A baboon?" I asked, looking at Sanma. Try as I might, I couldn't picture her as a baboon. Of course, she looked like Akane now. Maybe when Sanma looked like herself... "Yeah, well... they can't all be cute, you know." "I take it..." A female voice interrupted me. "It's rough having a monkey for an uncle." We looked around to see a giggling Hanaki walk up to us. "A baboon is a mighty ape, not a monkey!" Sanma insisted. "Whatever you say, Uncle." Hanaki gave Sanma a quick peck and then sat down beside me after giving me a much longer kiss. "Akane suggested I'd better keep an eye on my uncle. He isn't picking on you, is he?" "Nope. Well... not too much." "Hanaki, your husband's lips are very soft," Sanma casually commented. I glared at Sanma. "It was just a cheek peck." "I know you think you're hot stuff, Uncle, but keep your lips off my husband." Hanaki grinned at Sanma. I laughed and then looked over at Sanma. "I take it the baboon is one of those forms you hate worse than being a pig?" Sanma nodded. "That must have been very surprising for Ukyo." Sanma smiled. "Yup. She was very amazed that a cat could get a baboon curse. If she had known what else I would become, she would consider the baboon to be a bit... normal in comparison." "How soon until she realized that it was you, Sanma?" "Not too long after that, but I may have been better off as a baboon in retrospect." *********************************************************************** August 10-September 22, 1999 - Southern Japan Ukyo crouched down on the shore and watched the baboon pull itself out of the water. "A curse? How... well, I guess animals can fall into the springs too. It's not like I haven't seen stranger things." She studied the baboon for a few moments. "So you're cursed, huh? Must be really strange for a cat to change forms like that without knowing why it's happening." Sanma heard her words, but at the moment was more concerned with the horror he saw on his body. He craned his neck over his shoulder and stared at his backside which, in addition to being quite huge in relation to the rest of his body, was also dark red in color. Ukyo held out a hand to the baboon. "Coming, Red-chan?" Sanma stared at Ukyo in amazement. Ukyo giggled. "You look just like Ranma with that idiotic look on your face. Come on... I'll get you some hot water." Sanma shut his mouth. He walked forward and took Ukyo's hand. It was then that he was once again treated to a spectacular view of the naked Ukyo. Being a normal, healthy young... baboon, Sanma's body reacted to the stimulating sight. Ukyo blushed. "Oh my. Is it mating season for baboons? Just my luck that the first guy I met on this trip is a baboon." She took one last look at the baboon's backside, which had become engorged with blood making it turn bright red. "Well, I guess that old guy who hit on me yesterday was a baboon too." She smiled at her joke and took the baboon's hand and walked the short distance to her cart. Sanma tried to avoid looking at Ukyo as they walked. -C- -M- -D- Ukyo, now dressed in a robe, pulled the boiling pot of water off her cart's stove and walked over to the baboon. "This might be a little hot, but don't worry, Red-chan." Even though he knew it wouldn't do anything, Sanma sat motionless waiting for the water. He felt the hot water flow over him. He let out a slight yelp at the temperature, but otherwise wasn't affected. "Huh?" Ukyo frowned and poured more water over the baboon. "That's odd. I thought for sure that it was the curse that changed you. Well, no big deal. You seem to be handling the change okay." Sanma sighed. "Well, let's get to bed. But no monkey business tonight. Okay, you horny little thing?" Ukyo chuckled and crawled into her tent. Sanma hesitated and then crawled in after her. As usual, he listened to her pour out her soul to him as they drifted off to sleep. -C- -M- -D- "Red-chan, behave yourself!" Ukyo cried out as she tried to spread his legs. "You're not making this any easier!" Sanma squirmed trying to get away from Ukyo. Ukyo did a quick flip and sat on the baboon's chest. She snared one of his flailing legs and went to work. Her head bobbed as she fought the wriggling baboon's attempts to escape. Her head jerked up and she smiled when her job was done. "There! That's wasn't so bad, was it?" Ukyo got up and admired her handiwork. "Perfect. For the first time, it's pretty good." Sanma looked down at the diaper Ukyo had put on him and sighed. -C- -M- -D- Sanma used a stick to write his name in the dirt. Now that he had hands that could grip, he could actually tell Ukyo who he was. Ukyo noticed what he was doing and came over. She stared at the characters for a few moments. "I... am... a horse?" She looked at the baboon oddly. "You one of those smart apes they train to write and stuff?" Sanma shook his head and pointed at his writing again. He scratched his diaper. "Well, that's very good for a monkey, but even Ranma's handwriting is better than that!" Exasperated, Sanma blew air out of the side of his mouth. Ukyo giggled. "But not by much." -C- -M- -D- Sanma sat on the roof of the okonomiyaki cart and sulked. "Come on Red-chan, cheer up. I'll make you a squid okonomiyaki if you can attract some customers for me." Ukyo smiled sweetly at the baboon. Sanma tugged on the diaper. Ukyo sighed. "You still upset over the diaper? It's only so people don't freak about the big hairy monkey being so close to the food." Sanma grunted. "Please?" Ukyo looked at the baboon with pleading eyes. Sanma sighed. Sanma got up and did a few back flips down the length of the roof. "That's my monkey-boy." -C- -M- -D- Ukyo counted her take for the past week and giggled. "Red-chan, you are a golden monkey!" She leaned over and gave the baboon a kiss on his forehead. Sanma smiled. He looked over at Ukyo and then rolled his eyes when he saw that she was rolling around in the money. Ukyo finished her frolicking and put the money into the cart's hidden safe. She slipped under her sheets and then patted the sleeping mat beside her. "Come on, Red-chan, bedtime." Sanma lay down beside Ukyo. They slowly drifted off to sleep, wrapped in each other's arms. -C- -M- -D- Ukyo strolled down the road, taking a drink from a bottle. "So, Red-chan... we've got the day off, what do you want to do?" He glanced back at his rear end. "Why are you always looking your own ass, Red-chan? Isn't mine better?" Ukyo giggled. They walked a bit further until a small furry animal walked across the path. Suddenly, Ukyo found herself with a face full of fur when a terrified baboon jumped into her arms. "Red-chan! Ppffffttttt... It's just a little cat!" Ukyo turned her head and spit out some hair. "Come on! You're acting just like Ran... ma..." Sanma's eyes went wide. He nodded his head emphatically. "No... that's silly. How could a baboon be..." The cat in front of them meowed, causing Sanma to cling to Ukyo tighter. The water bottle Ukyo was holding slipped from her grip and splashed water over the baboon's hairy back. A flash of light momentarily blinded Ukyo. Ukyo suddenly found her face pressed against a hairless chest and had trouble holding on with the sudden increase in weight. Her legs suddenly gave out and she crashed to the ground. "Ouch..." When she opened her eyes, she saw a mass of dark-red hair leading into a pigtail. "Huh?" She shifted the body that was lying on top of her and gasped when she saw his face. "Ranma?!" Sanma blinked his eyes. "What... oh no, what am I now?" "Ranma, where did you come from?" Sanma frowned. "Ranma?" He looked down at his body and couldn't believe his eyes. "Alright!! I'm a guy again!!" "Ranma, I don't know what's going on... but could you get off me?" It was at that point that Sanma realized he was lying on top of Ukyo. He blushed at the feeling of her body under his. "Err... sorry." He got up and then checked his body out. "Fantastic!! I thought I'd be stuck going through life as a different animal of the week!" Ukyo stood up and brushed off her clothes. "What the heck is going on?" Sanma smiled. "First, I'm Sanma." Ukyo opened her mouth to speak. "Yes, I know I'm a man... ain't it great?!" He grinned broadly. "You got the curse back?" Ukyo looked at Sanma and was unable to restrain her laughter when she saw that he was wearing the baboon's diaper. Since it wasn't exactly the right size for a man, it now looked more like a thong than a diaper. "Yeah... sort of." Sanma gave Ukyo a big hug. "Thank you! Now all I have to do is never take another bath for the rest of my life and avoid all forms of water." "Sanma... what are you talking about?" Sanma smiled and slipped his hand around Ukyo's shoulder. "It's a long story. I'll tell you all about it over dinner. Alright, baby?" "Err... sure." Ukyo let herself be led away. The forgotten cat sniffed a bush by the path. It dug into the foliage and exposed a long slender arm. It licked the arm a few times before deciding it wasn't something to eat. The cat scurried off in search of something to fill its empty stomach. -C- -M- -D- Ukyo giggled. "So you were S-chan?" Sanma nodded. He was dressed in a spare set of clothes that Ukyo had in the cart. Fortunately for Sanma, it was one of her more masculine outfits. "Yeah... and it's not funny!" He took a bite of his okonomiyaki. Ukyo tried to restrain herself, but still looked ready to break out laughing at any second. "I'm sorry. Wow... that's some story. Why didn't you try to let us know who you were?" Sanma grunted. "I tried. I tried and tried. But everyone always saw me as an animal and made up excuses for my attempts. Like being a smart ape?" "Well, maybe if you learned to write neater..." She lost her battle and burst out laughing. Sanma huffed. "Well, maybe we should head back to Nerima tomorrow?" Sanma nodded. "Why? Things are okay as they are." Ukyo frowned. "Don't you want to go back to Akane?" "I think she has enough on her mind right now. I'd rather wait to break up with her until after Ranko's baby is born." Ukyo's jaw dropped. -C- -M- -D- In a small cabin in another part of the woods, a figure stirred. A pair of long slender arms stretched and then threw back the sheets. The young woman rose and then noticed her naked bosom. "Eeeekkk!" She covered herself quickly and then looked around. "Where am I?" Not seeing any clothes nearby, she wrapped the sheet around her body and stood up. She looked out the windows, but didn't recognize where she was. "Hello, is anyone here?" she called out loudly. An inner door opened and a tall burly man walked in from the main room of the cabin. "Oh... you're awake." He casually slipped his arm behind him to hide the camera he was carrying. As he walked towards the bed, he hid the camera behind a chair cushion. "I'm Mitsuru." "Where am I?" "In my cabin. I found you in the woods." "Where are my clothes?" "You weren't wearing any." She eyed the big man suspiciously. "So... you saw... everything?" She blushed. The man tried to look innocent. "Yeah... but I had no choice. You were unconscious." She buried her head in her hands. "Oh... no, now I'll never be able to get married!" She started to cry. "Err... it wasn't a big deal... I mean..." Suddenly the girl gasped. "Oh no! Was Ukyo out there too?" "Ukyo? You were alone, miss." "I've got to go find her." She started walking towards the door, but the room started to spin around her. "Oh my..." The man took hold of her and guided her back to the bed. "You should rest until you're better." "But my friend..." "I'll go outside and look for her for a bit, but it's getting late so it might be morning before we can do a proper search." The woman didn't notice the small smile that appeared on his face, which is commonly known as a leer. "Oh... okay." "I'll be back shortly. Um... what was your name anyway?" The redheaded girl smiled. "Sanma... Sanma Saotome." -C- -M- -D- "Sanma! What do you mean?!" Ukyo cried out. "Oh, don't act like you didn't notice how happy she was with Ranko. She's never going to want to marry Ranma or me." Ukyo couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Sanma, she does love you. I know she does. These are the same concerns you had in China." "No... It's different." "Why?" "Because I love you, Ukyo." Ukyo shuddered. "No..." She shook her head. "Yes..." Sanma leaned in. "This is not funny, Sanma! I've just gotten out of a relationship that ended badly. I don't need this crap now!" She tried to move away, but Sanma grabbed her wrist. Sanma looked into her eyes. "I love you. After spending all this time with you, I can see that clearly now. I could see the love in your actions too." "You were a cat and a baboon! I didn't know you were you!" A charming smile appeared on Sanma's face. "Don't fight it, Ucchan." He leaned in and gave the startled Ukyo a firm kiss on her trembling lips. After the kiss ended, he cupped her cheek in his hand. "Now, tell me you love me." Tears were pooling in Ukyo eyes. "I... do. You know I always have... but something's wrong with you." "Only if love is wrong." He leaned in and gave Ukyo a longer kiss. Ukyo got lost in the sensation and parted her lips to admit Sanma's tongue. A part of her knew it was wrong, but her body was lost in the moment. -C- -M- -D- "Come on, just a few pictures..." Sanma glared at the man and cringed back into the corner further. She held the sheet tightly to her bosom. "No! Only bad girls do that!!" "Sweetheart... you can't expect to stay in my cabin for free. You have to pay." "No!" -C- -M- -D- "No... Sanma..." "I love you..." "Sanchan..." -C- -M- -D- Mitsuru grimaced in pain as Sanma's knee connected with his groin. She then applied the palm of her hand to his jaw. He flew away from her and crashed into the far wall. "Oh my... did I do that?" Sanma looked at her own hands in awe. Mitsuru grunted and stirred from where he had fallen. "Bitch... I would have taken it easy on you, but now..." He rose to his feet, holding a knife that he had pulled from a holster strapped to his leg. Sanma cringed back. "No... please don't. I'm a virgin." She held her hands up in front of her. "All the better..." He took one step before a blue ball of chi hit him. He dropped to the ground, smoke rising from his burned clothes. Sanma looked at the blue energy that lingered on her fingers for a few seconds before dissipating into the air. "How did I do that?" She decided that leaving was probably a good idea, so she scurried past the groaning man and made her way outside. She looked around the dark forest she found herself in and clutched the sheet tightly. "Now where was Ukyo's cart?" She started walking, wrapping her arms around herself to keep warm. -C- -M- -D- Ukyo lay under Sanma and felt the sweat drip off his body with each movement of his body. "Oh... Sanma." Sanma ran his hand down her body and began to undo her shirt. Ukyo gasped when the cold night air assailed her chest and brought her to her senses. "No... Sanma, this is too fast." She pulled her shirt closed. Sanma paused and looked Ukyo in her eyes. "That's not what your body is saying." "I... I know. But even if... this is really you, I can't just jump into bed with you." "We've been sleeping together for almost the last month." "Well... yeah... but not like this." "I understand." Sanma pulled back and sighed. He looked longingly into Ukyo's eyes. "Sanma..." Ukyo paused as she realized she really had no idea what to say. "Let's just get some sleep.... um..." She glanced at the single small tent attached to the cart. Sanma smiled as he realized what Ukyo was worried about. "That's okay... I'll sleep out here. I wouldn't trust myself if I was that close to you." He winked. Ukyo blushed. "Thanks." She walked over and opened the flap and slid inside. "Goodnight," she said without looking back. "Goodnight. I love you." Ukyo paused, but then when inside and closed the tent flap. -C- -M- -D- Sanma huddled against a tree, shivering from the cool night air. She pulled the sheet tighter to her body. "Where's Ukyo?" -C- -M- -D- Sanma lay on the ground by the cart, shivering from the cold night air. Ukyo looked down at him with a confused look. After several seconds, she slipped a blanket over him. "I do love you, Sanma... but I think we're both fooling ourselves if we think it could ever work." She turned around and returned to the tent to get some sleep, but somehow she didn't think she would be getting much that night. She was right. -C- -M- -D- Sanma and Ukyo pushed the cart down the old dirt road. "Well, I've got to admit that this is easier with two people pushing." Ukyo wiped her forehead off. "Glad to help, babe." Sanma smiled at Ukyo. Ukyo sighed. "Why are you acting so differently?" "Why do you keep asking that? I'm not. The only difference is that I'm a man now." Ukyo giggled. "Ah! It's the testosterone then!" "That's what I love to see." "Huh?" "I love to see you smile. When we first started on this trip, you were always so sad and cried all the time. Now, I see that beautiful smile and I want to make sure you never have to be sad again." He reached out to touch Ukyo's cheek, but she shied away. "No... you're not going to get me again. You've been affected by whatever re-cursed you." "It's not a curse... it's a blessing." "Now I know you've lost it. The Sanma I know hated his curse and everything it led to." "This 'blessing' has led me to you, the woman I love." He touched her cheek again. Ukyo couldn't break away from his blue eyes this time. "Sanchan..." She leaned in and was rewarded with a sweet kiss that flowed to every part of her body. That thought didn't stop the kiss. -C- -M- -D- "Thank you, Mrs. Nimura." Sanma twirled around in the little light-green dress and looked at her reflection in the full-length mirror. "It's so cute." "No problem, honey. You can help me around the shop to pay it off." The middle-age woman smiled and walked back to the front counter of the little clothing shop. "That must have been awful being lost in the woods for two days." "Yes, but I managed. I hope my friend Ukyo is okay." "Well, I'll ask around. A girl with a okonomiyaki cart is going to be a welcome change in this small town if she shows up." Sanma smiled. "Wait till you taste it. It's the best." "You sound like a good customer." "Yup and her best friend!" -C- -M- -D- Sanma pulled Ukyo's shirt off and then started undoing the pants. "Sanma!!" Ukyo cried out. "What?" Ukyo ducked her naked body under the water. "I may have offered to let you bathe with me when you were a cat and a monkey... but not anymore!" Sanma looked at the naked woman in the river. "Such a shame." He was smiling as he pulled his borrowed shirt back on and walked away from the river. Ukyo was blushing as she plunged her head under the water. She gasped and shot to the surface. She gasped for breath. -C- -M- -D- "How may I help you?" Mrs. Nimura asked the young couple as they came into the store. "Um... my friend here needs some new clothes," Ukyo said, pushing Sanma in ahead of her. "Of course, I'll get my assistant to help you." Mrs. Nimura craned her neck to look in the back of the store. "Oh, she must be taking a break." She smiled and gestured towards the racks. "What did you have in mind?" "Red Chinese shirt and black pants. Three sets," Sanma said without hesitation. "And some underwear." Ukyo looked at Sanma. "We'll have to pick up some shoes later." Sanma nodded. "Well, I have some Chinese style clothing in the back here." She led them to the back of the store. As they passed a mannequin, Sanma stopped and fingered the blue dress hanging from it. "Ucchan... you'd look great in this." Ukyo sighed. "We came to get you some clothes, not me." "But it'd look good on you." "You know I don't wear dresses." "You should... you look gorgeous in them." Smelling a sale, Mrs. Nimura smiled. "He's right. A beautiful young woman like you shouldn't hide it." Ukyo blushed. "Well..." -C- -M- -D- Sanma hummed as he walked down the street with Ukyo. He had a red Chinese shirt on like he had always worn before. She had the blue dress on and looked a little uncomfortable. Ukyo touched the dresses hem hesitantly. "I don't know..." Sanma smiled and took Ukyo's hand. "You look ravishing, Ucchan." Ukyo blushed while adverting her eyes, but didn't try to pull her hand away from Sanma's grip. Behind them, a small redhead rushed into the clothing shop and bowed to Mrs. Nimura. "Sorry I'm late... I kind of got held up by a bunch of guys." Mrs. Nimura smiled. "No problem, Sanma. Don't worry about the guys around here, they're mostly harmless. The dating pool is so small that they get excited over any fresh meat. And you are probably the cutest thing they've seen in years." Sanma blushed and hid her face in her hands. Mrs. Nimura looked protectively at Sanma. -C- -M- -D- "Give me all the money in the cash register, old woman!" The young punk brandished a knife in front of him menacingly. Mrs. Nimura reached for the cash register with shaking hands. "Okay... okay..." Her voice was even shakier. The front door opened and Sanma walked in wearing her green dress. "Good morning, Mrs. Nimura!" "Sanma, run!!" Sanma saw the robber and started to inch backwards. "Don't move, bitch, or I cut the old lady!" He stepped closer to Mrs. Nimura and held the knife to her throat. "Don't hurt her!" Sanma blurted, her muscles tensing instinctively. The robber looked at Sanma appreciatively. "Hmmmm... and I thought that the money was the only treasure here." Mrs. Nimura finished pulling the money out and put it into a bag. "Here... just take it and leave." "Oh... I'll leave." He pushed her down and then hurried to the door. "Come on, Red, we're going to have a little fun!" He grinned broadly. "No... I've got to help Mrs. Nimura." Sanma made to go to her boss, but the robber grabbed her wrist. "Do as I say, or I'll hurt you both." He tilted the knife to drive home his point. "Don't..." Sanma muttered softly. "Come on..." The robber left the store, pulling Sanma behind her. Mrs. Nimura rushed out and grabbed the robber's jacket. "No... don't hurt her!!" "Let go!!" The robber swung the knife back at Mrs. Nimura. It never reached her. Sanma lashed out with her foot, knocking the knife out of the robber's hand. Following up her kick, she swung back and landed a knee to his gut. He dropped to his knees and Sanma pounded him across his back with her elbows. He fell to his stomach with a muffled grunt and lay still. "Sanma?" Sanma looked over at Mrs. Nimura. "Are you okay?" Mrs. Nimura nodded. "Yeah... that was... impressive." Sanma shrugged. "I just did what came naturally." Mrs. Nimura starred at the small girl in front of her. "That was natural to you?" Sanma shrugged. "Yeah... it's creepy. My body just reacts." Mrs. Nimura smiled. "Well, thank you." "That was nothing... you should see it when fire comes out of my hands. That's really something." Sanma smiled sweetly. Mrs. Nimura stared blankly at Sanma. -C- -M- -D- Three weeks after Ukyo started traveling with Sanma, in human form that is, Ukyo found herself unable to sleep. She slipped out of her tent and dug out a bottle of milk from her cart's icebox. After drinking a little, she returned the bottle and wiped her mouth off. She was returning to the tent when she saw Sanma curled up on the other side of the cart. He was shivering from the cold night air. It took her a while to answer her own question. "Sanma?" She waited. "Sanma?" Sanma opened his eyes and smiled when he saw Ukyo looking down at him. "What a beautiful sight." Ukyo blushed. "Um... I've been thinking. It's getting too cold to sleep outside at night... do you want to sleep in the tent?" Sanma smiled broadly. "Of course, babe." He started to rise. Ukyo put her hand on his head to stop him. "Just sleep... nothing else." "Of course." -C- -M- -D- Ukyo awoke in Sanma's arms. "Huh?" She almost pounded him, but then remembered that she had invited him in. She looked at him for several moments before slipping out of the tent. As she stretched, she took a long breath of clean air. -C- -M- -D- The tree exploded into tiny fragments. Sanma casually walked over and picked one of the splinters of wood up and used it to pick his teeth. "You could have just bought toothpicks in the next town," Ukyo dryly commented. "Where would the fun be in that?" "Say... can you try to teach me the Moko Takabisha again?" Sanma looked skeptically at Ukyo. "Are you sure you want to? The first time you tried..." "Yeah, I know... I burned my hands. But I want to try again." "Okay..." Sanma's tone of voice did not instill Ukyo with confidence, which is the foundation of the Moko Takabisha, of course. -C- -M- -D- The chi ball sputtered and died between Ukyo's hands. "Damn..." "No... that's okay. You're doing better. At least you're not letting the energy get out of control and explode in your hands anymore." Ukyo looked down at the cooking mitts on her hands. "Maybe the mitts are interfering?" Sanma shook his head. "No, I've worn gloves before and they never affected my blasts. The energy may have to flow through the gloves, but it isn't hindered by it." "I see." Ukyo nodded and tried to form a chi ball again. She concentrated hard on what she was the most confidant about, her cooking. The ball formed and slowly grew in intensity. "Good... good... Now aim it with you hands and then give it a 'push' with your mind to release it." Ukyo aimed towards the small tree with the bull's eye--which looked suspiciously like a pig--painted on it and 'pushed' with her mind. The chi ball flew from her fingers and impacted the ground about two meters in front of her. "Good! That's much better." Sanma walked up to her and gave her a reassuring hug. "But I didn't hit the target." Upset, Ukyo took off her cooking mitts and threw them on the ground in disgust. "That's okay. It takes time and practice to master the Moko Takabisha." "But you did it so fast." "Do you really want to learn it like I did?" Ukyo smiled lopsidedly. "No, I guess I don't want to look that bad when I learn it." "Good." A split second later, Sanma caught the insult. "Hey!!" Ukyo smiled as she picked up her bandoleer. She fingered one of the throwing spatulas and then pulled it out. "I've still got these babies." Sanma smiled proudly at his student. "Good, never limit yourself to one weapon." Ukyo saw a spark flicker between her finger and the spatula. "Huh?" She concentrated a bit and suddenly found the metal spatula glowing with green energy. "Wow..." "Interesting... you focused the energy on the spatula instead of in midair. Try hitting the target." He gestured towards the tree. "This is something I know how to do." Ukyo grinned and pulled back her arm to throw it. "Ukyo's Flaming Spatula!" She tossed the spatula at the tree with a flick of her wrist. The glowing spatula left a green trail behind it as it shot towards the tree. It hit dead center on the snout... target. A split second later the tree exploded. Ukyo and Sanma were covered with pieces of wood. "Wow..." Sanma smiled proudly at his student. "Great, Ukyo! By focusing on the spatula instead of in midair, you didn't have to focus as hard." Ukyo smiled with pride. "You might want to work on the name, though." Ukyo's face fell. "But I like the name..." "It's your choice. You can work on charging your spatulas some more, but don't give up on your other training." "I won't." "Good." Sanma leaned in and kissed her. After the kiss broke up. "Um... Sanma?" "Yeah?" "I'll boil some hot water... you really are starting to smell bad." "But I don't want to risk transforming..." "You said yourself that hot water doesn't seem to affect you anymore." "Not that I know of..." "It's either a hot bath for you or you sleep outside again." Ukyo smiled devilishly. "Well... a little hot water never hurt..." "Smart man. Okay, now it's time for YOUR training." "Huh? I know how to wash myself." Ukyo shook her head. "Not that... this." She reached out and grabbed her two giant spatulas from where they were resting against a tree. In one movement, she flicked the smaller one at Sanma and then readied the larger one. "Time for you to learn to use the combat spatula." Sanma looked uncertainly at the spatula in his hands. "Um... why?" "Well, you're the one always saying not to limit yourself to one weapon. So now I'm the teacher." "Okay, but I already know everything there is to know about fighting with weapons. The basics are always the same no matter what the weapon is." "Oh, really?" Ukyo grinned and swung her spatula at Sanma. -C- -M- -D- After washing himself with the hot water without incident, Sanma pulled a clean shirt on. "Ahhh... that felt nice." He rubbed his face, hoping the large spatula bruise had vanished, but he could still see the mark in the little mirror that was propped up on Ukyo's cart. "You decent?" Ukyo's voice asked from inside the tent. "Most of the time." "Very funny." Ukyo poked her head out of the tent and made sure before taking too long of a look. "See, I told you shouldn't have worried about hot water." She tried to keep a straight face and not laugh at the mark on his face. "Just being care..." Sanma felt a raindrop. "Huh?" He made a dash for the tent, but by the time he reached it, he was soaked from the sudden downpour of cold rain. He did a quick check of his body. "Still a man." He grinned. "Maybe the curse is gone. It's been pretty long since you last transformed." Sanma grabbed Ukyo and danced around in the rain with her. "Yup, looks like it!!" "Lucky you." Sanma suddenly grew very serious. "No, lucky you." He gave her a long kiss. -C- -M- -D- The hot water poured down Sanma's body. She ran her hands through her long red hair and massaged the soap into it. "Sanma, are you doing okay in there?" a voice called from outside the bathroom. "Yeah, thanks for letting me use your shower, Mrs. Nimura!" "No problem, you should have told me you were sleeping in the park all these nights." "I didn't want to impose on you." "Nonsense, you're the best salesgirl I've ever had. I'm going to hate to see you go." Sanma smiled at the compliment. "Me too, but I really have to get back to Tokyo soon." "Got a boyfriend back there?" "Nope. But my friend's husband is expecting a baby soon, so I want to get back before then." Outside the bathroom, Mrs. Nimura frowned as she tried to figure out that statement. -C- -M- -D- Sanma waved goodbye to Mrs. Nimura from the window of the train. She hated to leave, but she had earned enough to pay her back for the dress and everything, get a ticket to Tokyo, and even have some pocket change. After the train left the station, she watched the scenery fly by and turned down the various offers from the men and boys on the train. "No, thank you, but I'm sure someone else would love to rub your pony." The boy sulked as he walked away. At the second stop, Sanma happened to glance outside. "Ukyo?" she gasped when she recognized the cart on the far edge of the platform. She grabbed her small bag and dashed off the train. She ran towards the unattended cart, looking around frantically for Ukyo. "Ukyo?!" She ran around the corner of the station building and straight into someone's back. "Oh... I'm sorry." Then she noticed who she ran into. "Ukyo!!" Then she blushed when she saw what Ukyo was doing. "Oh my... tee hee." Ukyo broke the kiss and turned around to find out who had run into her. "Ranko? What the..." Sanma smiled. "Silly, it's me, Sanma. I was so worried about you!" Ukyo studied the young redhead for a few moments before she turned around and punched the guy she had just been kissing. "Ranma, you jerk! I don't know what the hell you're playing at, but you're okonomiyaki toppings!!" Sanma rubbed his chin and then frowned at seeing the redhead. "Ranko?" "I'm Sanma. Why are you kissing Ukyo, Ranma?" The male Sanma looked very confused. "Huh? I'm Sanma." Ukyo looked back and fourth between the two redheads. "Um... what's going on here?" -C- -M- -D- "So I was on the train headed back to Tokyo when I saw your cart. I'm so glad I've finally found you!" Sanma wrapped her arms around Ukyo and hugged her closely. She then glanced at the male Sanma. "Why were you kissing Ranma?" "For the last time... I'm Sanma!!" Ukyo put up a hand to silence him. "She listened to your story... so hush up." She turned back to the female Sanma. "Well, the stories are the same... sort of. You think you've been a girl your whole life?" "I have." Ukyo turned to the male Sanma. "And you remember having the recent curses, but not the girl curse?" "Of course, I've never been cursed to be a girl. Only Ranma was until he was split in two earlier this year. He always was a klutz." Ukyo looked at Sanma for several moments as she realized that she had never thought to grill Sanma on his memories of his early life. Ukyo shook her head sadly. "Oh, Akane is going to lose it now. Four of you to marry." The female Sanma blushed. "Ukyo, you know that Ranko is a lesbian, but I'm not." Ukyo frowned. The male Sanma shrugged and looked at Ukyo's eyes. "And I've already found someone else to love." Ukyo blushed, but couldn't pull herself away from his piercing blue eyes. "I love Akane, but that weird marriage would never work out. Ranma and me knew it, but couldn't force Akane to choose between us. It was her decision." Ukyo gasped as she realized what must have happened. "Wait a second... Sanma... err... I'll call you-" She pointed at the female Sanma. "-San-chan and you-" She pointed at the male Sanma. "San-kun for now. Okay?" Both Sanmas nodded. "San-kun, you said that you've been cycling through different curses since you reactivated the spring in Jusenkyo, right?" San-kun nodded. "Well, what if this is another curse?" San-chan frowned. "Huh?" "Spring of Drowned Twins." San-kun and San-chan looked at each other oddly. "Then why are our memories different?" San-kun asked. "Well... I suppose your personalities split as well. That's why you both have memories of being only male or female. Your love for Akane split too, so maybe it's not as overpowering." She glanced at San-kun and frowned. She paused and then corrected herself. "I don't know..." San-chan began. "I do love Akane, but like a sister." "Yeah, I love her too... but she made her choice. I've fallen for you now, Ukyo. Don't shut me out." San-kun reached to touch Ukyo's cheek with his hand, but she shied away. "Don't... um... we've got to get you back together again. Let's get some cold water." Even as Ukyo was saying that, she was wondering if she really wanted that. "We already tried that," San-kun reminded Ukyo. "I know, but I think we should try again with both of you." "Okay, I'm not convinced this theory is correct, but I'll give it a try for you, baby." "Thanks... San-chan?" "You're my best friend, Ukyo, I'll do anything you want me too." "Me too." The steamy look San-kun gave Ukyo told her that the two Sanmas had different things on their minds. *********************************************************************** >From the personal journal of James Davidson: October 18, 2057 "Um... not to question your story, but does love really work that way? Splitting and all?" Sanma shrugged. "I don't really know... do you?" I shrugged. "It wasn't really a splitting of the love, but the reasons that I love Akane were split. My girl side got the friendship that I felt for Akane and my male side got the... well... um..." I smiled at her discomfort. "Primal urges to jump her bones?" Sanma smiled. "Yeah... that about sums it up. Basically, my male side wasn't inclined to share Akane--we men are territorial by nature after all--so he considered Akane out of his reach." I raised my eyebrows at her deep comment. "Where did that deep observation come from?" "Well..." Hanaki giggled. "Probably read it in a book or something." Sanma looked embarrassed, something I didn't often see. Hanaki seems to have a knack for getting the better of Sanma's outward smugness and boasting. "Anyway..." Sanma shot an annoyed look at Hanaki and received a tongue in response. "I guess my girl side was the part of me that was willing to share Akane, my male side wanted her to myself and since I couldn't have that, I fell in love with Ukyo." "Makes sense." "Yeah... but I've had some time to think about it since then. At the time, I wasn't thinking straight. My self-loathing after Ranko and Akane's wedding, my worries that I might never be able to recover the love of my life, and then the problems brought on by my new curse led me down a path that surprised even me." *********************************************************************** September 22-29, 1999 - Southern Japan San-chan wiped the cold water off her face and wrung out her T-shirt. "Sorry, Ukyo." "It's okay, it's not your fault. San-kun?" San-kun walked over to Ukyo, pulling off his Chinese shirt. "Ready, willing, and able." Ukyo was sure he wasn't just taking about the water and decided he really could use a good cold shower, curse or not. "Okay..." She poured a bucket of cold water over his head like she had done for San-chan. Other than having two wet Sanmas now, there was no change. "See, told you I was a man for good." "Okay, let's try both at the same time." Ukyo handed both of the Sanmas a bucket of water and stood back. "On three... One. Two. Three." Two buckets tipped over two redheads. The result was the same, a co-ed Sanma wet T-shirt contest. Ukyo had mixed feelings about the failure. On one hand, she felt bad that Akane might not be able to get her single Sanma back. She looked at San-kun and blushed when he threw a kiss back at her. That was the other hand. -C- -M- -D- For lack of a better plan, the new threesome traveled together towards Tokyo and got to know each other all over again. Ukyo had made sure that San-chan slept between her and San-kun to avoid any amorous feelings that might develop. The problem was, even having San-chan next to her got Ukyo's imagination going. Especially when she thought about Akane and all three Ranmas together. She had to constantly remind herself that she couldn't start a little Sanma harem like Akane had, but she wasn't sure why she couldn't. Well, other than the fact that neither she nor San-chan were lesbians, of course. One day, Ukyo was busy making an okonomiyaki for a customer when San-chan bounded up to her. "Ukyo! Ukyo!" Ukyo looked over at the energetic redhead. "Yes, San-chan?" "I've got a date! Can I borrow your blue dress?" Ukyo's jaw dropped. "A... date?" "Yeah, this cute guy asked me out and he seems nice and he called me pretty and..." Ukyo interrupted the girl. "Um... I don't know if that's a good idea, San-chan." "Why, do you want to meet him first and see if he's okay?" "No... that's not it. Remember that you aren't really a girl." San-chan frowned. "But... but... I am one now. And he's really cute." Ukyo sighed. "Are you sure he's not just after your body?" "I don't think so." "I really don't know..." "Please?" "Well, have him come over so I can meet him." Inside, Ukyo cringed at hearing her own words. -C- -M- -D- "No!" "San-kun, the boy is very nice and respectful. If San-chan is stuck as a girl, I don't see any harm in it. And San-chan does seem to be a girl at heart." San-kun grumbled. "Maybe... but I can't stand how she acts all girlish all the time. It's embarrassing to think she was once part of me." Ukyo smiled. "Well, I can see traces of the Sanma you used to be in her." "No way, I was never that girlish!!" -C- -M- -D- A week later, they were halfway back to Tokyo. San-chan was on an errand, so San-kun confronted Ukyo after dinner. "What's the matter, Ucchan? You've been avoiding getting close to me since SHE arrived." "San-kun... it was bad enough to let myself be drawn into that relationship before, but now..." "Now? Now I'm a single man and the curse isn't working anymore. Just like when Ranko and Ranma split, there isn't anyway to recombine." "Yes, but Akane..." "...isn't here and made her choice when she married only Ranko. And I've made mine... I love you, Ukyo." He leaned over and gave Ukyo a long kiss. Tears came to Ukyo's eyes and she found herself unable to reason her feelings away with logic, even her logic that was skewed due to her friendship with Akane. "I love you too, Sanma. I can't deny it anymore." -C- -M- -D- San-chan returned to the cart with the bucket of water she had just fetched from the river. "Ukyo? Brother?" Not receiving any response, she poked her head into the tent. "Oh my..." Startled, a sweaty Ukyo spun her torso around to see who it was. In the process, she knocked the bucket out of San-chan's hands, sending the contents splashing across the tent in a wide wave. "San-chan... err... can you leave us alone for..." Her awkward question trailed off when she saw San-chan disappear in a flash of light that seemed to flow down the splashing water. More astonishing was the sudden disappearance of a certain body part of San-kun's from within Ukyo. She turned around and gasped when she saw who she was now on top of. "Akane?" Sanma frowned and then looked down at her body. She had made love to Akane enough times to recognize whose breasts she now had. "Oh... shit..." Sanma barely finished her curse when she convulsed in pain. After thrashing about for several seconds, Sanma fainted. -C- -M- -D- "Sanma? Sanma-honey... wake up." Sanma opened her eyes and blinked a few times to clear her vision. "Huh?" She finally recognized Ukyo looking down at her. "Ukyo? Um... what happened?" "Well... as far as I can tell, when San-chan splashed the water on you, she splashed herself and the water formed a bridge between you both. I guess that's what is needed to recombine twins split by the Spring of Drowned Twins curse." Sanma rose to a sitting position and rubbed her head. "I've got a massive headache." Ukyo held out a cold compress to Sanma's head. "You scared me when you fainted like that." "Fainted? Oh... yeah." Sanma looked down at her chest and pulled the sheet covering her breasts away. She sighed at the sight. "Do those really belong to who I think they do?" Ukyo nodded and held out a little mirror to Sanma. Sanma examined her face for several minutes. "Spring of Drowned Akane." Ukyo nodded. "Well, if I have to be a woman at least I'm a knockout." Ukyo frowned. "So how much do you remember about when you were split in two?" Sanma thought for a few moments. "Things are a little fuzzy, but I think I remember it all. When Mrs. Nimura found me and gave me a job. When you hid yourself under the water... you're so bashful. When I found us having... oh my. Um... err..." Ukyo turned away from Sanma to hide her tears. "So you remember both of your forms?" "Yeah... It's a bit odd having two sets of memories for that time, but it seems the two personalities have recombined into one." Sanma scratched Akane's chin. "Maybe Cologne was wrong about that... or it's different because of the way this new curse works." "I see." Sanma frowned. "Is something wrong?" Ukyo shook her head. "No... nothing." Without looking back, she fled from the tent. Pausing only to wrap the sheet around her naked body, Sanma took off after the fleeing woman. "Ukyo!" He saw Ukyo running towards the east and followed. "Ukyo!" After a short chase she caught up and grabbed Ukyo's wrist, spinning her around in the process. "Ukyo, what's the matter?" "Nothing..." "Just tell me, Ucchan." Sanma lifted Ukyo's bowed head with her finger. "I knew it was too good to last." "What?" "Our love. Now that you've recombined you must love Akane again... I was only loved by San-kun." Sanma pondered this for several seconds before replying. "Yes, I do feel a stronger love for Akane now than when I was two separate people." Ukyo fought back the tears. "But my love for you hasn't gone away." Sanma craned her neck, or Akane's neck depending on how you look at it, and gave Ukyo a long kiss. After the kiss, Ukyo watched Akane's face pull away. A part of her was getting over the shock of being kissed by another woman--her best friend no less--and the other part was trying to understand how Sanma could still love her. "Huh?" Sanma smirked. "What a reaction to a kiss. I love you, Ukyo. Don't expect me to explain it, but the love I felt for you is still as strong or stronger now. Maybe because it grew stronger while I was a separate man." "So... what does this mean?" "That I've got a decision to make." *********************************************************************** >From the personal journal of James Davidson: October 18, 2057 "Well, I imagine making that decision must have been painful for you." "Not as painful as the memories of my date with that guy." Sanma shuddered. I lifted an eyebrow. "Did San-chan go all the way with him?" "No!! Um... she was a good girl. Just kissing." Sanma shuddered again. I smirked and restrained myself. Hanaki wasn't as controlled and laughed out loud. "That's my uncle. The cross-species, cross-gender, cross-dressing, and cross-sexual jack of all trades." I chuckled. Sanma was not amused. "Why you're my favorite grand-niece, I'll never know." Hanaki smiled and gave her uncle a kiss on the cheek. "I love you too, Uncle." "So what happened when you returned to Nerima?" "Well... I really screwed up after that." I nodded my understanding. "Things were pretty crazy at the end of ninety-nine, I'm sure that didn't help." "Nope... it made it worse." Sanma suddenly threw up his hands to deflect a kick aimed at his head. Hanaki rolled to the side and traded blows with another attacker. She seemed to be trying to keep a buffer space between the attackers and me. Soon there were at least a dozen young teenagers attacking Sanma and Hanaki. Despite being outnumbered, they were deflecting the onslaught without difficulty. But the attackers were not giving up and looked determined to overwhelm them. My first thought was that the Buyierfei possessed them, but so far I didn't see any chi attacks used. It wasn't until I saw Akane standing calmly at the corner of her house that I realized what was going on. "Sanma, behind you!!" Sanma glanced behind her. The momentary distraction allowed one of the attackers to land a hard punch to her jaw. Sanma's head snapped back hard at the force of the punch, but she quickly retaliated. Sanma's kick sent the young girl flying backwards. "James, that wasn't nice," Akane remarked from her position. She ruined her scolding by allowing an amused smile to form on her face. Sanma on the other hand, glared at me as she flipped a young boy onto the roof. After a series of attacks and counter-attacks, the dust settled and the students all bowed respectfully to Sanma and Hanaki. Akane smiled as she approached us. "Okay, class, that's all for today. Darmi, nice solid hit there, but next time don't hold back." The young girl who had punched Sanma smiled broadly. Considering the force of that hit, if she was holding back then her full out punches must be pretty impressive. Sanma rubbed her chin and muttered. "She only got it in because someone distracted me." She looked directly at me. Akane giggled and kissed Sanma's sore chin. "You shouldn't have let your guard down. That's one of the core principles of the Tendo/Saotome School of Almost Anything Goes Martial Arts." "Almost?" I asked, while walking over to Akane with Hanaki. Akane chuckled. "I sometimes add that as a joke. We don't use certain techniques developed by Sanma's father anymore." "But you do attack people at random during training class?" Akane nodded. "Yup, keeps everyone in the Compound ready for anything. Don't worry, I told them not to hurt you." The students filed away, comparing notes about how many hits they each got in. Sanma hugged Akane. "You have to get Kamsu to tighten his stance up. He's still leaving a gap in his defense after his kicks." Akane nodded. "Yeah... I'm going to get Yohachi to spend some one-on-one time with him to help Kamsu with that problem." "You know, I must be used to life in the Compound." "How so?" Akane asked. "I don't find a horde of kids attacking us unusual anymore." "Don't relax... things will get even weirder," Sanma remarked and started laughing. Somehow I knew she was right. *********************************************************************** October 26-November 7th, 1999 - Nerima, Japan A baby cried in the dark Tendo house. The father stirred. "It's your turn." The mother rolled over. "No, I changed him last time." Some grumbling was heard as a figure slipped off the futon and stood up. "Okay, okay. What's the matter, little Daiji?" The baby continued to cry as her father cradled her. "There, there. Hmmmm... she's not wet." The mother sighed. "He's probably hungry." The father nodded then sat down and undid her nightie to expose her breast. Wiping the nipple off first, she held the baby to it and winced a bit as little Daiji started to suckle. "That's my precious little girl." "How's my son?" the mother asked from the futon. The father giggled. "She's doing fine." Ranko sighed. "Do you have to keep calling him 'she'?" "As long as you insist on calling her a boy even when she's a girl, yes." "How are we going to raise her? As a boy or a girl?" Akane sighed. They'd already had this conversation many times already and couldn't agree how to handle it. No one they talked to was sure. It was a fairly unique situation, after all. "I don't know, Ranko. Can we discuss this in the morning when I'm not feeding our child?" Ranko looked up as Akane as she nursed their child. "Doesn't that hurt?" Akane shook her head. "No... just a little when she starts, but it's very relaxing after that." She gently stroked the baby's back. "I feel so close to her when we share this time together." She looked over at Ranko. "You should be the one doing this, you know. If you don't start soon, your milk will dry up." "No way! I'm a man and men don't breast feed their children!" "Shhhhh..." Akane scolded her husband. "And most men don't give birth to beautiful little girls like Daiji." "Yeah... but still..." "You're lucky that I'm lactating because I'm pregnant or you'd have to do this." Akane thought for a second before speaking again. "Actually, I'm lucky. I can't begin to describe how happy I feel during the time I spend breast feeding her." "We could bottle feed him." Akane smiled at Ranko's usual response about the breast feeding issue. "Breast feeding is healthier for our child. My mother breast fed my sisters and me and your mother breast fed you, so why are you so resistant?" "How do you know my mother breast fed me?" "I asked her. We talk a lot about these things. You should try it sometime." "I don't like to talk about female things with Mom." Akane laughed and put the baby over her shoulder and patted her back. "I know. I'm glad to spend this time with Daiji, so if you're uncomfortable with it then you don't have to do it." "Well, I'm glad that's settled then." Ranko rolled over and closed her eyes. Akane smiled at her husband and then flinched when the baby let out a mighty burp. "Oh yeah, she's your child alright." She stood up and put the baby back in her crib. "I never..." Ranko's denial was interrupted when she let out a huge burp. She blushed. Akane chuckled as she finished wiping off her breast and slid in beside Ranko. "You were saying?" "It's that cheap okonomiyaki joint we went to! Ukyo's okonomiyaki never made me burp!" Akane giggled and wrapped her arms around Ranko. "I know." She kissed her husband before settling onto her back. It was only a few moments before she felt Ranko's hands caressing her breasts. She smiled as she felt Ranko press against her. "Between Daiji waking us up through the night and you trying to catch up after not being able to make love while you were confined to bed, we'll never get any sleep." "Are you complaining?" Ranko asked as she massaged Akane. Akane gasped. "No..." -C- -M- -D- The next day Ranko was in the family room when she heard the baby start to cry. She shuffled over to the bassinet. "What's wrong, Daiji?" It only took few seconds for the odor to reach her nose. "Uh... oh..." She looked around. "Akane?!" Her mother's voice replied from the kitchen. "She's at the doctor's." "Oh, right. Um, can you change Daiji?" Nodoka's response sounded a little irritated. "I can't right now. All the stuff is in the nursery." Ranko grumbled something that it would be better that she not use in front of the baby. She picked up the baby and carried it into the nursery. She put it in the bassinet and undid the little jumper that she had bought for her son. The jumper looked suspiciously like a red Chinese shirt and black pants outfit a certain trio of Ranmas usually wore. Ranko thought back to the baby classes she and Akane went to. "Discard the old diaper." She held her breath as she dropped the diaper into the diaper pail. "Clean the baby. She grimaced at the sight and looked towards the kitchen. "Mom?!" Nodoka's response was in the form of humming a busy little tune. Ranko sighed and went to work cleaning her son up. She had just finished when little Daiji decided he needed to go again and sent a stream of liquid into Ranko's face. "Pffftttt..." Ranko quickly covered the little penis with a towel. "How can you do that to me, my son?" She thought about her statement for a few seconds. "Son... huh?" She smiled broadly as something occurred to her. She rushed out and came back moments later with a steaming cup. She made sure it wasn't too hot and then poured the water over her son and got a daughter in return. "Sorry, my son, but a man's got to do what a man's got to do when he's diapering his aquatransexual son." Daiji cooed softly as Ranko finished cleaning and diapering her daughter. "Good girl... err... boy." The baby gurgled, causing Ranko to smile. "Whatever." She leaned down and kissed her daughter. -C- -M- -D- A few days passed and the Tendo family settled into a routine of midnight changes, feedings, and crying fits. At breakfast one morning, all of the Tendo household members were calmly eating breakfast when Kasumi dropped a bombshell. "I'm going to move in with Dr. Tofu." Soun disintegrated into tears. "Oh, my oldest is going to live in sin!" Little Hinako sighed and drew some energy from her nearby fighting fish. Her body grew and filled out the previously baggy kimono she was wearing. She pulled her husband into a hug to comfort him. "There, there, honey, it'll be okay." Akane sighed and looked at her father. "Dad, it's not like Nabiki isn't doing the same thing!" Soun looked up from Hinako's chest and looked like the thought had never occurred to him. "Oh, my two oldest are living in sin!!" "Actually, Daddy, Akane isn't legally married and has one child already and another on the way that was conceived by another man." Everyone looked around to see Nabiki standing in the doorway with Mousse. She was wearing a devilish smirk on her face. Soun doubled his tear output. "Oh, all my daughters are living in sin!" Kasumi shot a stern look at Nabiki and Akane. "Neither of you are helping." Akane and Nabiki smiled apologetically. Soun had settled down with his wife's help. "Why... why can't you get married first?" He was looking at Kasumi, but he glanced briefly at Nabiki. Kasumi knelt close to her father and put a hand on his shoulder. "Father, it's not that I'd be living with him... that way. It's just that his clinic is closer to the train station and will allow me to study more." Akane looked sadly at her oldest sister. "It's because of Daiji's crying, isn't it?" Kasumi looked at Akane. "Partly. I love little Daiji, but I've been having trouble concentrating on my studies. When Father and I were staying with him while the house was being rebuilt, I was able to keep up with my studies and even get ahead a bit, but now I'm starting to fall behind again. Please don't hate me, Akane." Akane shook her head. "No, I understand. It's been hard for Ranko and me to keep up with our high school studies, I can only imagine what you have to be going though to become a doctor." "Thank you for understanding." Kasumi hugged Akane tightly. "And for the record, Mousse sleeps in his cage, not on my futon." Nabiki smiled at Mousse. "As I said weeks ago, we're taking it slow." Ranko laughed and looked at Mousse. "You don't really sleep in a cage, do you?" Mousse nodded. "Yeah... I got used to it. But Nabiki keeps it next to her futon." "Ah!! So you are sleeping with her!" Ranko broke down laughing. "Oh, my middle daughter is sleeping with waterfowl!" Soun started to sob into Hinako's chest again. "Daddy, are you just crying so you can nuzzle your new wife's chest?" Nabiki asked, smirking. "No!" Soun insisted, but when he looked up they could all see that his eyes weren't wet. "Sure, Daddy." Nabiki looked over at Akane. "So where's my niecephew?" Akane frowned. "Huh?" "Well, since I have no idea what sex the baby is right now, how else should I refer to my niecephew?" Akane chuckled. "At the moment, HE'S sleeping quietly in the nursery." "Oh, I'll wait until he wakes up then." Just then, a baby's cry rang out and Nabiki smiled. "I'll go check on him." A somewhat weary looking Akane smiled. "Thanks." "No problem." Nabiki rushed off into the nursery. Ranko looked at Mousse. "So, how's life at Mon Canard?" Mousse smiled. "Good, it's nice to be more than a busboy there." Ranko paused in her attempts to inhale the rice in her bowl long enough to ask a question. "What are you doing?" "I'm the maitre'd." Ranko frowned at the unfamiliar word. "What do you do?" "Take reservations, greet the guests, help the waitresses serve, and clear the tables." Ranko frowned and leaned over and whispered to Akane. "Isn't that pretty much what a busboy does?" Akane shushed her husband. Just then, a shocked cry rang out from the nursery. "Wowsa, that's disgusting!!" "Uh oh..." Ranko jumped to her feet and scurried to the kitchen. She then rushed into the nursery with a glass of hot water. As soon as she entered the room, she knew she was too late. "Sorry about that. It's usually a good idea to change him into a girl before changing his diaper. SHE doesn't have the range that HE does." Nabiki wiped her face off with a towel. "NOW you tell me." Ranko smiled apologetically. "Sorry. We're going to get a faucet with hot and cold running water put into the nursery to help with changing him." Nabiki wondered if Ranko meant changing his diaper or changing Daiji between a boy and a girl. Probably both. "Good idea." She sighed and took the hot water and transformed Daiji into a girl before finishing her work. "I'm amazed at how calmly she handles the water." Ranko smiled. "Yeah, I don't know where she gets that from. I always hated water." Nabiki smiled. "Well, that's a good sign that she won't pick up any of your other bad habits." Ranko frowned. "What bad habits?" Nabiki laughed as she finished putting a new jumper she brought with her on Daiji. "There you go." Ranko looked at the fancy embroidered jumper. It was white with gold trim and wasn't something she had seen Daiji wear before. "Where'd that come from?" "It was Mousse's when he was a baby. He thought it would look good on Daiji." Nabiki lifted her niece into her arms and cradled her gently. "It does. Thanks." Ranko and Nabiki made their way back to the family room with the baby. They were greeted with a series of ooh's and ah's. "How adorable," Nodoka mentioned. Ranko smiled at Mousse. "Thanks for the jumper, Mousse, but shouldn't you save it for your own kids?" Nabiki blushed. "Ranko!!" Mousse smiled and pulled out a handful of similar jumpers from his robe. "Amazon mothers don't believe in washing clothes that often, so they keep a lot of them on hand." "That explains all the training potties." Ranko laughed. Mousse nodded. "Yup, they REALLY don't like cleaning those." -C- -M- -D- A couple of weeks later, Akane walked into the bathroom with Daiji in her arms. She giggled when she saw Ranko checking herself out in the mirror. "What's wrong?" Ranko pulled her hand away from the thick flap of skin she was squeezing on her stomach. "Nothin..." Akane put Daiji in a bassinet near the shower and started to wash herself and the baby. "Don't worry, now that you're starting to get back into your normal exercise routine, I'm sure you'll get back into the lean, mean fighting machine you were before you gave birth." "I hope so. These stretch marks are really ugly. And my ass is huge! And my breasts are heavy. And..." Ranko's complaints stopped when Akane wrapped her arms around her husband. "You are as lovely as the day I married you." "Thanks." Ranko kissed her wife, took one last look at her body, and then sunk herself into the round bathtub. Akane was amazed that Ranko didn't complain about being called lovely. She wasn't sure if that a good or bad thing, but as long as they were happy she didn't care. "You know, if you'd just breast feed, your breasts wouldn't feel as heavy and ache as much." "Yeah... yeah..." Akane finished washing her daughter and then rinsed the baby off with cold water. She lifted her son out of the bassinet and walked over to the bathtub. "Here, let me take her." Ranko reached for Daiji. Akane handed her son to Ranko and then awkwardly climbed into the tub. The water displaced by her pregnant belly flowed over the edge. "Ahhhhh..." Ranko lowered the baby into the water, letting the hot water flow over her son and give her a daughter in return. The new family of three sat in the tub together and enjoyed their peaceful Sunday afternoon. -C- -M- -D- An explosion rocked the Tendo yard later that day. Body fragments flew everywhere. Amazon warriors with their weapons drawn quickly descended on the source of the explosion. Nipplering scanned the area and then looked at Ranko. "Where is the enemy?" Ranko blushed and looked at Nipplering. "Sorry, I was just practicing my Moko Takabisha blasts. It's been a while since I've used them and wanted to get back in fighting form." She gestured at the pieces of the practice dummy she had just blasted. Nipplering waved off her warriors. "Can you please inform us when you are going to train like that?" "Yeah... sorry." Ranko noticed that Nipplering was looking her up and down, making her very uncomfortable. "What?" "If you like, there are some ancient Amazon techniques for regaining a woman's fighting form quickly after giving birth that I can show you." Ranko looked at the tall Amazon. "Really?" "Yes, it is considered very important to Amazon women to be able to fight as soon as possible after giving birth." Ranko nodded. "Yeah, I can understand that. Okay, I'll give it a try." -C- -M- -D- An hour of vigorous exercises followed. Ranko was barely able to keep up with Nipplering, not that Ranko would ever admit that. Akane poked her head out the porch doors and saw her husband and Nipplering in a position she would never have expected to find them in. "Ranko?" Ranko popped out of the backward circle she had been bent back into and looked at Akane. "Yes?" "What was that?" Ranko looked at Nipplering. "Its some Amazon post-maternity exercises Nipplering has been showing me. They already seem to be working. I feel great!" Nipplering nodded from her bent back position. "Amazon women pride themselves in being ready for battle within hours of giving birth." Akane smiled. "Maybe I can try it after I have my baby. Anyway, I'm going to go help Kasumi settle into her love nest." A shocked cry from Kasumi was heard from inside the house. "Akane! It's not a love nest!" Akane smirked. "Ranko, can you look after Daiji while we're gone?" Ranko nodded. "No problem." -C- -M- -D- Daiji was crying as she had been for the past half-hour. "There... there." Ranko cradled her child in her arms and looked around nervously. "Why did Akane take off so close to feeding time?" The baby's cry intensified. "There... there." Ranko sighed and finally sat down on a chair. "Damn... I really wish Akane was here to take care of this, but a man's got to do what a man's got to do. Even if it's something totally unmanly like this." She held Daiji with one hand and undid her shirt with her other. She brushed Daiji's red hair out of the way before positioning the baby next to her nipple. "We may have to give you a pigtail to control that hair there, Daiji." Daiji reached out for the nipple and wrapped her lips around it. Ranko winced in pain and yelped as little Daiji started to suckle. "Dang... that's my strong son. Or daughter at the moment, I guess." She sat there silently with her daughter nuzzled to her chest. Shortly, mother and daughter were peacefully sharing their moment together. Ranko started to hum a soothing little song. She didn't remember where she had heard it, but it seemed appropriate. Nodoka would have recognized it as the tune she used to hum to Ranma when he was a baby. The doorbell interrupted the peaceful moment. Ranko looked towards the front of the house. "Can someone..." She trailed off as she remembered that she was alone in the house. She sighed, not at all pleased at the interruption. She pulled Daiji off her nipple and burped her quickly. Unfortunately, she also got a large stain on her shoulder in the process. "Ewwwww..." She wiped the mess off her shirt and then rebuttoned it. The doorbell rang again. "Coming!!" Ranko wiped Daiji's mouth off and walked towards the front door with her daughter cradled in her arms. She opened the door and smiled when she saw Akane standing there. "Forget your key?" She smiled and leaned out and gave her wife a long kiss. Or tried to. She was a little started to be pushed away violently after only about two seconds of the kiss. "What do you think you doing, you jerk?!" Akane wiped her mouth off and repeatedly spat on the ground. "What's the matter, Akane?" "Um, Ranko, that's not Akane. It's Sanma." Ranko looked over and finally noticed Ukyo standing next to Akane. "Ukyo? Hey, welcome back!" She looked around. "You said Sanma's around, where is he?" "You just kissed me, you jerk!!" Akane snapped. Ranko gasped as she finally got a real good look at 'Akane'. The first unusual thing she noticed that Akane was dressed in a red Chinese shirt with black pants. Although Ranko thought it looked good on Akane, it was not what she usually wore. Ranko gasped when she noticed the second unusual thing: The Akane in front of her was not pregnant. Only the fact that Ukyo was there and said it was really Sanma prevented Ranko from going ballistic over the missing baby. "What the hell? Sanma? How can this be Sanma? Are you sure?" Sanma sighed. "It's a long story." "Real long," Ukyo said. "Can we come in?" "Of course." The wrapped bundle in Ranko's arms started cooing. Ukyo's face spread out into a broad smile. "Is that your baby?" Ranko nodded. "Oh... can I hold it?" Ranko smiled and carefully handed Daiji over. "Make sure to support his head." Ukyo smiled as she held the baby. "He's beautiful." "A boy, huh? That's great," Sanma commented and smiled at his nephew. Ranko smiled awkwardly. "Um... actually, that's an even longer story." She looked at Sanma in Akane's body. "Maybe." -C- -M- -D- "We're home!" Akane waddled down the hall and into the family room. She dropped the small bag of groceries that she had been carrying when she saw herself holding her daughter. "What the..." She shook her head to clear the hallucination from her eyes, but when she looked again she was still looking at herself. The other Akane smiled awkwardly. "Hi, Akane. I'm back." Akane could barely catch her breath. "Wha... what is going on?" Ranko stood up and walked over to her wife. "Akane, Sanma had a little problem on the way back to Nerima." She took Akane's arm to steady her. "Sanma?" Akane gasped. She looked around the room and saw Ukyo. "Ukyo?" Ukyo looked awkwardly at Akane. "Hi, Akane." She frowned as she noticed Akane's pregnant belly. Akane looked back at herself. "You're... Sanma?" "Yeah. It's a long story," Ranko explained, since she had just heard the story about how Sanma got recursed. "Real long." -C- -M- -D- One long story later, Akane leaned back against the wall and tried to absorb all that they had told her about the new curse. "You were S-chan and the cat?" Sanma nodded. "You could have done something to let me know!" Sanma bowed his head. "I tried. I'm sorry." Akane sighed and looked at her long lost fiance for several moments before speaking. "It's very creepy looking at myself like this." Ranko laughed. "Now you know how I felt when I had to look at Ranma and Sanma." "I guess." Akane suddenly realized that she had been so shocked, that she never had a chance to greet Sanma. "I'm glad you're back. We'll get through this new curse together. Don't worry." Sanma and Ukyo exchanged a worried glance. Akane slid over to Sanma and gave herself a long kiss. "Damn, that's very disturbing seeing my wife kiss herself." Sanma glared at Ranko. "It's not as disturbing as you kissing me, you jerk!" Akane frowned. "Huh"? Ranko blushed and looked awkwardly away. "I sort of kissed Sanma when he showed up at the door." Akane giggled. "I'd have loved to have seen that." Sanma crossed her arms over Akane's breasts. "Don't get your hopes up, it ain't going to happen again." "Yeah." Ranko repeated the gesture, except with her own breasts. Akane laughed. "Well, I'm glad you're both back." "No problem. Um... Akane, I'll be glad to work out with you. It looks like you haven't been able to keep up with your workouts while Ranko was pregnant." Sanma suddenly realized what she had just said and tried to get her foot out of her mouth. She just drove it deeper in. "Err... I mean... you're not fat or anything, but it looks like you could use a little more workout time." Akane's jaw dropped and she looked at Ranko. "You didn't tell them?" Ranko shrugged. "I didn't have time." Akane shook her head sadly and then looked at Sanma. "I'm not fat, you dolt, I'm pregnant." Ukyo had suspected as much, but wasn't sure how to mention it. Sanma gasped. "You... you're pregnant?" Akane nodded. Sanma jumped to his feet and clenched his fist. "Who the hell did this to you? I'll kill him!!" Akane and Ranko shared a good laugh. "Get in line. I've got first dibs." Ranko clenched her fist. Akane smiled and tried to calm Sanma down. "Relax, Sanma. Ranma is the father. Although, I don't want him dead, if you give him a good knock on his noggin for me I'd appreciate it." Sanma frowned. "Ranma?" She thought for a few seconds. "Yeah, that makes sense. He's not back?" Akane shook her head sadly. "No..." Sanma looked at Ukyo and they both knew it was not the time to tell Akane their other long story. -C- -M- -D- Later that night, Sanma knocked on the door to Nabiki's old room. Ukyo's voice responded. "Come in." Sanma walked in and looked at Ukyo. "How are you?" "Fine." Sanma could tell Ukyo was upset. "I can't tell her now. Not like this. I just can't tell her with her being pregnant and Ranma missing. It'll be too hard on her and I don't want to cause her any more pain than I already have to." "Yeah, I know." Ukyo rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. "Are you staying in her room with them?" Sanma could hear the jealously in Ukyo's voice. "No, I'll be staying in Kasumi's room next door. Akane asked me to stay with her and Ranko, but I said I didn't want to chance Ranko doing something to me while I slept. She seemed to understand the attraction of this body." "Want to try some cold water?" "Um... no, I can handle sleeping apart from you until we can tell them." Ukyo giggled. "That's not what I meant. I meant so that you can change forms." Sanma blushed. "Oh... well... I don't have any idea what I'll be next. I'd rather try to stay human as long as possible." Ukyo nodded. "I understand." "We'll find some way to tell them. Maybe we can try to find out where Ranma is hiding and get him back here." Sanma sat down on the bed next to Ukyo. "Why do you think he's not back yet?" Sanma started to rub Ukyo's arm. "I don't know... he might have felt awkward about being around while Ranko and Akane were married. I know I was when I was here as 'S-chan'." "Was?" Sanma smiled and leaned down and gave Ukyo a long kiss. "I've found someone to fill the hole in my heart." Ukyo smiled and caressed Sanma's cheek. "You know, it still feels a little odd to be kissed by Akane." Sanma smiled with Akane's lips. "You'd rather kiss the baboon?" Ukyo giggled. "No... I'll get used to it. "Well, enjoy it while it lasts, I know I will. I have nightmares about what I may be next." Ukyo cocked her head to one side. "Really, what do you dream you'll become?" "Terrible things... Lions and tigers and bears." "Oh my." Sanma ran her hand down Ukyo's thigh. "Whatever I become next, I can only promise you that I will still love you be I man, woman, or beast." Ukyo felt Sanma's hand slip under her skirt. "You'd better get to your own room before you do need a cold shower to cool down, you beast." She winked. "Too late." Sanma smirked and gave Ukyo another kiss. "Ukyo?" Ranko's voice called out from outside the room. Sanma sprang away from Ukyo just as the door opened. She took a deep breath to calm herself. "What is it, Ranko?" Ranko looked between Ukyo and Sanma. "Oh, Sanma." She looked at Ukyo. "Akane wanted me to make sure you had everything you needed." Ukyo nodded. "Yeah. Can you thank Akane again for letting me stay here for a bit until I can clean and reopen my restaurant?" "No problem." Ranko looked at Sanma. "Damn, do you know how gorgeous you look?" Sanma face faulted. "Ranko!!" "Sorry, man, but I can't get over how beautiful you look to me." Sanma glared at Ranko. "Watch it, or the next time I'm a cat-" Ranko shuddered. "-I'll lick you all over." Ranko shuddered more. "Don't even think something like that!" Sanma grinned. -C- -M- -D- A couple days later, Ranko poked her head into the nursery and saw her wife holding their baby. "Akane, have you seen... Oh, Sanma." Sanma looked up from the baby she was cradling in her arms. "What is it, Sugar Muffin?" Ranko smiled. "You can't fool me anymore. I make sure to check my wife's belly before touching her." "You calling her fat?" Ranko gulped and looked around to make sure she wasn't around. "No, of course not." Sanma laughed and then bounced little Daiji when she started to gurgle. "Smart man." She looked down at Daiji when the baby started crying. "Uh... oh. I think she needs to be changed." Ranko looked at her child. "No, she's hungry. Here, let me have her." Sanma frowned and handed over the child. "How can you be so sure?" Ranko cradled her child in one arm, while undoing her shirt with the other. "I can tell." She exposed her breast. "What are you doing?!" Ranko smiled and held Daiji up to her nipple. "Feeding my baby." "Gross!!" Ranko sighed and stroked Daiji's hair. "That's what I thought at first, too. But... I've come to treasure this time with her." Sanma frowned. "How do you know she's a girl now?" "I can tell." She fingered the little pigtail Daiji now sported. "Are you going to become a hair dresser?" Sanma laughed. "No, I just thought it would look good on her." Ranko smiled. "It does. I was waiting for her hair to get a little longer." "Oh... sorry." Sanma looked at the ground. Ranko shook his head. "Don't worry about it. She's almost as much your child as mine." "Thanks, but I'll leave the diapering and breast feeding to you and Akane." Ranko shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. As Ranko continued to nurse Daiji, Sanma watched and started to long for something she couldn't quite pin down. She saw something between Ranko and Daiji that stirred some unfamiliar feelings deep with her, but didn't know why. -C- -M- -D- A few days after returning to Nerima, Ukyo finished washing the floor and looked at her now sparkling clean restaurant. "There, all done." She smiled and then walked to the front and opened the door. She slid the sign onto the sidewalk to indicate she was open for business. "Need any help?" Ukyo turned to see Akane standing behind her. "Oh... no thanks, Akane, I'm all set." Akane patted her flat belly and grinned. Ukyo slapped her forehead. "Oh! Sanma." She glanced around before she pulled Sanma into the restaurant and gave her a long kiss. Sanma smiled when the kiss ended a couple minutes later. "You've got to try to pay more attention or you'll end up kissing Akane one of these days." "I feel like I'm doing that already." Ukyo giggled. "Well, you seemed to have timed your arrival here perfectly to avoid doing any work, I'm all done already." Ukyo didn't miss seeing the slight twitch of a smile on Sanma's lips. "Damn. Well then, can I be your first customer?" Ukyo looked sternly at Sanma. "A paying customer?" Sanma gulped and tried to go though her pockets to find some change. "Um... err..." Ukyo giggled. "You'll never change... " She gave her boyfriend a quick kiss and then walked behind the grill to start cooking up a okonomiyaki. "So, any luck finding Ranma?" Sanma shook his head. "Nope. With Nabiki's help, we discovered that he did return to Japan back in June using the plane ticket he had with him, but we haven't found any trace of where he went after that." "Damn... I really don't know how much longer we can hide our relationship from Akane." "Yeah, it's getting pretty hard to make excuses why I won't sleep in the same room with her. Um... err... she made me take a hot bath with her the other day. I'm sorry." Sanma bowed her head. Ukyo smirked. "Two naked Akane's in a tub together, that must have been quite a sight. It's okay, Sanma, Akane is my friend and I hope somehow we can stay friends after we tell her, but with her pregnant and Ranma missing I don't think it's a good idea to tell her right now." "Yeah... it's just really rough being so close to her knowing what I have to do to her. It's going to devastate her." Ukyo sighed. "I hope not, but we can only hope to soften the blow at this point." "Right..." Sanma's response was not as firm as Ukyo would have liked. "Sanma? Are you..." Ukyo trailed off. "Am I what?" "Are you having second thoughts?" Sanma looked at Ukyo and paused for a second. Two seconds. Three seconds. "No... but I feel like I've betrayed her and somehow... betrayed myself." Ukyo frowned. She would have preferred a quick 'no', but she knew what Sanma was talking about. "I know... that's why I kept resisting your advances. I felt I would be betraying Akane if I let myself act on my feelings." She flipped the okonomiyaki onto the plate in front of Sanma. "Well, we've acted." Sanma took a large bite of the okonomiyaki, savoring the taste. "Now we just have to fess up to it." Ukyo sighed. "Yeah... time to face the mallet." -C- -M- -D- A couple of days later, Ukyo and Sanma walked up to the Tendo house together. Ukyo looked at Sanma. "Are you sure?" Sanma reluctantly nodded. "We can't wait any longer. There's still no sign of Ranma and Akane just asked Nabiki about arranging a marriage ceremony so that I can marry her." Ukyo cringed. "Okay, but let's take it slowly and gauge how she handles it. I don't want to cause any problems with the baby." Sanma nodded. A short while later, Sanma and Ukyo knelt across from Akane and Ranko in the family room. "Okay, what's up?" Akane asked, blissfully unaware of what was to come. Ukyo and Sanma exchanged a quick glance and then Sanma spoke. "We need to tell you something." "What?" Sanma took a deep breath. "You remember how I told you that I split into a man and a woman before being cursed with my present good looks?" She smiled with Akane's face. Akane laughed and nodded. "Well..." Sanma fidgeted, unable to continue. Ukyo took up the discussion. "They didn't exactly have the same... personalities and memories as Sanma normally does." Ranko started to laugh. "What, did San-chan sleep with a lot of guys, or something?" "No!! He just kissed me!!" Sanma blurted. Akane's eyes went wide at the revelation. Ranko continued laughing. Ukyo frowned. "Um... San-chan did have a date with a nice young boy when we thought that the split was permanent, but that's not exactly what we wanted to tell you." Akane visibly relaxed. "Good, for a second I thought you were going to tell me he's in love with another man." She giggled. Ukyo and Sanma resisted the urge to look at each other in fear that they wouldn't be able to continue. Ranko looked at Sanma. "Well, I could understand guys falling for her. She's drop dead gorgeous." Akane laughed. "Now, or when he looks like you?" "Both." Ranko and Akane had a good laugh, which Ukyo and Sanma reluctantly joined. After the laughs petered out, Akane asked the question Ukyo and Sanma knew would come. "So what did you want to tell us?" Ukyo and Sanma exchanged another glance before Sanma spoke. "Well, after I split..." Sanma's confession was interrupted when Nabiki ran in carrying a videotape. "I found Ranma!!" Everyone spun around to look at Nabiki and saw Mousse come in behind her. Akane eye's widened. "Huh? Where?" Sanma suddenly felt like a great weight had been lifted from her shoulders. "Yeah, where?" She exchanged a look with Ukyo. "Well, you'll never guess what he's doing." Nabiki laughed as she walked over to the TV and put the videotape in. Ranko was the first to guess. "A male prostitute?" Nabiki giggled, but shook her head. Akane made her suggestion. "Doing hard time for blowing up something?" "Nope." Nabiki looked at Sanma. "Um... I don't know. A sideshow freak in a circus?" Nabiki frowned and thought for a second. "Nope, but it is sort of like a circus." Akane was too impatient to play guessing games. "Come on, what is it?" Nabiki pressed the play button. "Okay, Akane, but try not to go into labor or anything." Akane nodded and looked at the screen. An advertisement for some sort of superhero martial arts show was on. "He didn't get a job in one of those cheesy superhero shows, did he?" Nabiki shook her head and pointed at the screen. The commercial had ended and a show that was obviously trying to look like a real news show was now on-screen. An all too perky young woman sat next to a dashing young man. "Welcome back to Millennium Madness," the young man said. "Our next segment focuses on a young man who is said to be able to perform miracles." As the host droned on and on, Akane started to get sick to her stomach. And she was pretty sure it wasn't due to her pregnancy. After a number of interruptions by his co-host, the young man finally got to the interesting part of his story. "We have obtained this home video that was smuggled out by one of our field reporters. The authorities that have seen the video have dismissed it all as millennium madness." "Hey, Kenshi, that's the name of our show!!" the girl suddenly blurted. Kenshi rolled his eyes. "That's right, you twit," he muttered, unsuccessfully trying to keep the mikes from hearing him. He turned towards the camera. "Reports of the eyewitnesses have indicated that the man has performed numerous miracles. Please remember that these are unconfirmed and may be exaggerations. They spoke of him being able to form fire from his hands, move mountains with the force of his will alone, leap tall buildings in a single bound-" The girl interrupted. "Sounds like Superman!" Kenshi clenched his fists and tried to ignore the interruption. "-heal the wounded, and attract an unusual number of female admirers among the members of his cult." "Gee, that's different than our last story. He was such an ugly jerk." "Sis, will you shut up!!" Kenshi snapped and then continued. "Here is the only video we have of the man. I apologize for the low quality." Akane gasped as the screen showed Ranma standing in the front of a large crowd of chanting people. "Ranma?" Lots of amazed and confused comments went around the Tendo family room. On screen between occasional bursts of static and lighting variations, Ranma held his hands up and spoke. "My children, thank you, together we will save this world from the evils that plague it!" The crowd cheered and called out Ranma's name repeatedly. The video and audio dissolved in static and Nabiki turned off the TV, but not before a cheesy superhero show that was taped on top of the pseudo-news show appeared. Nabiki blushed as she pulled out the videotape. "I don't know how that got on there." Sanma and Ukyo exchanged an uneasy glance. Ukyo looked at Nabiki and asked a question. "How did Ranma end up there?" Nabiki shook her head. "I'm not sure about that. After I saw this I did some quick checking and Ranma did fly out of Narita airport in August. When I first found out he returned to Japan, I never thought to check if he left the country after that. I'm sorry for missing that." Akane shook her head. "That's okay... no one's perfect." Nabiki seemed to take that as an insult. "But how can that be Ranma? And all those things they said he did." Ranko puffed up her chest and boasted. "I don't know, I'm sure some of them are true." She snapped her fingers and formed a chi ball between her fingers. "Fire from his hands." Ukyo nodded. "All three of them are unusually high jumpers." "Yeah, and you know how irresistible we are to women," Sanma remarked, earning a scowl from Ukyo. Akane smirked. "Yeah... that does sound like Ranma alright." She sighed. "So what do we do?" Ukyo and Sanma exchanged a relieved look. Finding Ranma meant that they could afford to delay their confession for a little while longer. Sanma jumped to her feet. "We go there and drag the jerk back here." Ukyo nodded and got to her feet. "Yes, I'll be glad to go with Sanma to bring him back." "We'll all go." Akane tried to get up. Ranko stopped her. "There is no way I'm letting you go this close to your due date! I'll go." Sanma shook her head. "No, we can handle this. You should stay with Akane. She needs someone to be there for her and the baby." "But I really think I should go. What if Ranma is in trouble or won't come back?" Ranko asked, pleadingly. Akane smiled at her husband. She knew that Ranko had been growing more and more restless since she gave birth and would love to go on an adventure. "Ranko, I know you want to get out of the house and all, but if *I* can't go then I need my Lamaze partner with me." "But..." Akane looked into her husband's eyes. "Please?" Ranko sighed as she saw an adventure slip out of her grasp. "Okay... I guess I'll stay." Mousse cleared his throat. "If you like, I'll go with them." Nabiki smiled. "Great, then you can let me know what Sanma transforms into next. I've got a lot of money riding on him." She looked at her cash cow. Sanma glared at her. "I still can't believe you're betting on what this stupid curse turns me into next!!" "Hey, I'm giving you ten percent of the take, so stop your whining!" "You said twenty percent yesterday!" Nabiki's expression didn't change as she denied that. "No, I didn't." Akane chuckled. "Don't worry, Sanma, it's just for fun. But if you can arrange to be a dog next, I'd appreciate it." She winked. Sanma rolled her eyes. Nabiki checked her organizer. "And don't forget, turning into a Mexican Chihuahua will get Akane a double Jackpot." Inside, Nabiki chuckled. *********************************************************************** >From the personal journal of James Davidson: October 18, 2057 "How on earth did Ranma get mixed up in one of those millennium cults?" Akane smiled. "It's a real long story and one I've been waiting for the right time to tell you." "Like now?" Akane grinned. "Yeah, I guess it is about time that I told you about what that idiot went and did after returning to Japan, but it'll have to wait for another day." She stifled a yawn. I stretched my arms and suddenly felt the urge to yawn. "It's long past time you told me, actually." Akane smiled. "If I told you how everything ends all at once, where would the fun be in that?" I smiled. "You sound like your husband." "Well, she looks like me, so why shouldn't she act like me?" Sanma asked from the hallway to the kitchen. She was, of course, correct. Akane did look like how Sanma currently looked. Or more accurately, Sanma currently looked like Akane. "I'm the original, honey." "Are you sure?" "Quite sure." "Darn, that means I'll have to cancel that speech I was going to make declaring myself ruler of the world." Akane laughed. "You wouldn't want the responsibility, honey." "Probably not, but I could finally get my face carved on the moon's surface." I frowned. "Huh?" Akane smiled at me. "Well, the three egomaniacs that I have had the pleasure and misfortune to be married to were always trying to think up the best way they could be immortalized for saving the world." "Well, we've saved it several times, you know," Sanma commented. "Yes, I know... but isn't it enough that you know that you have made a difference?" Sanma thought for a few moments before answering. "No." Somehow, neither Akane nor I were surprised by that answer. [End - Chapter 25] Coming soon: Chapter 26: It's a Small World After All, Ranma ======================================================================= The real author's (Jim Lazar) notes/ramblings: For all those people who wondered why I didn't use the Spring of Drowned Twins to split Ranma way back in chapter five, this is the reason. I needed to use it here and the SOD Twins wouldn't produce the proper side effects to the initial split (Sanma, for instance) or be permanent. I'd like to thank my pre-readers Jonathan Ng, David Johnston, Jyh-I Lu, Rei No Tenshi, EBJ, Thomas Kinnen, Johan Holmburg, and Michael A. Chase for helping me find and fix problems with this story. Thank you all. Of course in the end, any mistakes and botched characters are my fault. Revision 0.0 - Rough draft (August 30, 1999) Revision 0.1 - Sanma's return to Nerima added (October 9, 1999) Revision 0.3 - Pre-reader draft (October 27, 1999) Revision 0.4 - FFML draft (November 9, 1999) Revision 1.0 - Final version (December 1, 1999) Revision 1.1 - First RAAC posting (December 5, 1999)